The NPC Problem: Why Having 1,000 Followers Still Feels Like Total Isolation


8 min read

You have hundreds of contacts, dozens of group chats and a full social calendar. And still, it sometimes feels like no one actually knows you.

In this post, we explore Wang Yangming's radical concept of 'oneness with all things' — and why this 16th-century Neo-Confucian idea might be the most practical cure for modern loneliness.

We have never been more 'connected'. And many of us have never felt more alone.

This is not a paradox; it is a design feature. Digital connection optimises for quantity of contact, not quality of presence. 

You can accumulate 800 followers and still spend Friday evening in the peculiar loneliness of being technically surrounded while feeling genuinely unseen.

The modern loneliness epidemic is not about social isolation. It is about the quality of contact: specifically, about whether your interactions involve real presence or the management of impressions.

Other people have become, in many digital contexts, what gamers call NPCs: non-playable characters. Background figures you can mute, ignore or 'swipe away' the moment they become inconvenient. 

And the problem is: when you treat others as NPCs, you feel like one yourself.

Wang Yangming was a 16th-century Neo-Confucian philosopher, military commander and one of the most interesting minds in Chinese history. He offers a diagnosis and a cure that cuts through all of this with unusual directness.

The Radical Claim: We Are One Body

Wang Yangming's central philosophical claim sounds extreme until you sit with it. He argues that the human heart-mind is not a private, sealed chamber — it is a resonant organ that is naturally continuous with the world around it. 

"To manifest one's clear character is to form one body with Heaven, Earth, and all things."— Inquiry on the Great Learning

To manifest one’s clear character is the process of stripping away the "mud" of selfish desires (more on this later). What's revealed is liangzhi (innate knowing) which is the "mirror" of your true nature.

When that mirror is clean, you view Heaven, Earth, and all things (even inanimate objects like stones) as part of your own experience. 

This is not an abstract theory but a natural humane response; for example, feeling distress when seeing a child in danger or a plant destroyed. 

Right now, this looks like the involuntary pang you  when you see a stranger crying on public transport, even though you have no idea what they are going through. 

Or the discomfort you experience when you watch an animal suffer on a nature documentary. These are not performances of sympathy. 

They are evidence that your heart-mind is already wired for connection, not just with people you know, but with life more broadly.

Wang calls these 'cannot help' moments: the instinctive flashes of compassion that bypass rational self-interest and reveal your actual nature. 

If you see a child about to fall into a well, you feel alarm and distress before you have time to calculate whether helping serves your interests. That gut-lurch is the proof of oneness.

How to achieve oneness with all things? Wang writes:

"Loving the people is how you bring this interconnectedness to life in practice." — Inquiry on the Great Learning


Loving people is the understanding that the suffering of others is literally a pain in your own "body." 

Just as your hand instinctively moves to protect your eye from a speck of dust, a person who has formed "one body" feels a neighbor’s hunger or a forest’s destruction as a personal injury.

Today, forming "one body" isn't about mystical levitation; it’s about breaking the "Main Character" delusion.

Imagine you’re in a toxic group chat where everyone is tearing down a mutual friend. Your "clear character" knows this is wrong, but your ego wants to fit in. 

Manifesting interconnectedness means stepping out of your private bubble and sending a message that shifts the tone or checks in on the victim.

By treating their reputation as your own, you prove that your "self" doesn't end at your skin—it lives in how you protect the dignity of the whole "body."

What Blocks the Connection?

If we are naturally wired for this kind of deep connection, why does the world feel so fractured and cold? 

Why can you scroll past genuine suffering without flinching? 

Why does the person sitting next to you on the train feel like a stranger from another species?

Wang's answer is specific: selfish desires and, in 2026, digital desensitisation.

"When someone's mind becomes consumed by desires and clouded by selfish impulses — driven by greed and fear, or overtaken by rage — they can end up destroying both the natural world and harming other people."
— Inquiry on the Great Learning

Digital environments compound this. Algorithmic feeds prioritise outrage and envy which are emotional states that are highly engaging but deeply isolating. 

They also encourage you to treat other people as data points: profiles to assess, content to consume, connections to leverage.

The specific modern version Wang would recognise: befriending someone primarily because of what they can do for your career. 

Using a conversation to network rather than to genuinely know. 

Scrolling past a friend's difficult post because engagement feels costly right now.

The Antidote 

Wang calls the antidote zhi liangzhi which is the extension of innate knowing: the active daily process of removing selfish desires and let your natural goodness and connection shine through.

For Wang, "knowing" and "acting" are actually the same thing. He calls this zhixing heyi (unity of knowing and doing). Just as smelling a foul odor and hating it occur at the same time, recognising an evil act and being repulsed by it are one and the same.

Concretely, it means: If you say you "know" that ghosting a friend is hurtful but you do it anyway, Wang would argue you don't actually know it yet, you only have an abstract idea of it. 

Zhi liangzhi is the "extension" or "realisation" of that knowledge. It is the process of closing the gap between your inner moral flash and your outer physical movement.

In 2026, zhi liangzhi looks like the moment you’re mid-scroll on a busy commute and notice an elderly passenger struggling with a heavy bag.

Your "innate knowing" (liangzhi) flashes which are a gut-level recognition that they need help. But then, your "selfish desires" intervene: you don’t want to lose your seat, or you feel "socially awkward" breaking the digital trance.

Extension of innate knowing happens when you consciously push past that friction. By pocketing your phone and offering a hand, you actively clear the ego’s "noise," allowing your natural connection to that person to manifest as physical action.

Starting Small: The Sprout Approach

The good news: Wang is not asking you to love humanity in the abstract. That is actually impossible, and he knows it.

"The affection shared between family members is the very spark of life in the human spirit; it is the seedling from which universal love for all people and all things grows."
— Instructions for Practical Living

You start with the warmth you already have — for a partner, a sibling, a close friend. You notice how natural and effortless that care feels. 

Then you consciously extend it: one step outward, to someone slightly beyond your inner circle. 

The barista who serves you every morning. The colleague you never quite made time for. The lonely neighbour you have been meaning to check in on.

This is not a grand gesture. It is a small, daily practice of moving the boundary of your care slightly further than habit requires.

Ancient Wisdom, Applied

1. Break the NPC Delusion (Achieving Oneness)

To overcome modern loneliness, you must stop treating people as profiles to be managed and start achieving oneness through empathy. 

Practise "One Body" thinking by treating another person’s inconvenience or suffering as a personal injury to yourself. 

In your next group chat, if a mutual friend is being "cancelled" or mocked, don't stay silent to protect your own social standing. By stepping in to protect their dignity, you bridge the gap between "me" and "them," manifesting your clear character and proving that your heart-mind is continuous with the world around you.

2. Push Past the "Main Character" Friction (Zhi Liangzhi)

The moment you feel an impulse to help but hesitate because it feels "socially awkward" or "inconvenient," you are experiencing selfish desires blocking your light. 

Practise zhi liangzhi—the extension of innate knowing—by consciously pushing through that mental noise. 

If your liangzhi tells you to help someone with a heavy bag, don't just feel the sympathy; perform the action. Extension is the active daily process of turning a "cannot help" feeling into a physical reality, proving that your goodness is a verb, not just a vibe.

3. Cultivate Your Compassion from the Seedling (Start with the Sprout)

Don't get overwhelmed trying to "save the world" or love abstract humanity; Wang Yangming knows that is a recipe for burnout. Instead, start with the sprout—the natural affection you already have for your partner, sibling, or best friend. 

Once you notice how effortless that care feels, consciously extend it one degree outward to a "mid-tier" contact, like the barista you see daily or the neighbour you usually ignore. 

By nurturing the "seedling" of existing love, you naturally grow the capacity for universal connection without it feeling like a performance.

4. Practise active ego-suppression in your next conversation (Remove Selfish Desires)

In your next significant conversation, notice the moments when you feel the urge to interrupt to sound smart, check your phone because you are bored, or redirect the topic toward yourself. 

Recognise each of these as a 'selfish desire' obscuring your innate knowing. Consciously set it aside. Return your full attention to the person in front of you. 

You will find that genuine connection is not something you create. It is something you uncover when the noise of the self quiets down.

5. Conduct a daily Heart Audit (Unity of Knowing and Doing)

Before you sleep, spend three minutes asking yourself two questions: Was I truly present in my interactions today, or was I going through the motions? Was I connecting genuinely, or performing a role? 

If you find you were cold, dismissive or distracted, do not spiral into guilt — that is just more ego. Simply acknowledge it and resolve to bring more earnestness tomorrow. 

Small, honest daily reflection is how Wang Yangming's cultivation practice actually works.

Final Thoughts

Loneliness is not, at its root, a social problem. It is a perceptual one. When you reduce other people to profiles and interactions to transactions, you guarantee isolation, regardless of how many contacts you have.

Wang Yangming's oneness is not mysticism. It is a description of what human beings are when they stop obstructing themselves. 

Healing your own loneliness and healing the world's turn out to be the same act — one sincere connection at a time.

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